Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Of sirs and noodles

[Two residents meet in a busy afternoon clinic.]
Resident 1: Hey Noodle, how are you?
Resident 2: Sir, very good, Sir. How, are you, Sir?
Resident 1: Great, Noodle, just great, it's good to see you Noodle.
Resident 2: Hey, I had something I wanted to show you. [Pulls ekg out of pocket.] What do you think of this, Sir?
Resident 1: Interesting, Noodle, interesting. Look at the morphology of that QRS. [Points to squiggle on ekg.] That's pretty! What do you think, Noodle, are those fusion complexes?
Resident 2: Sir, that's what I thought at first, but when I calculated the derivative of the curve I was able to map the impulse to a specific location on the anterior right ventricle. Those are PVC's from an ectopic ventricular focus firing at a rate of 13 beats per minute.
Resident 1: Well done, Noodle, you're a genius!
Resident 2: Not at all, Sir, not at all.
Resident 1: So how's your wife, Noodle?
Resident 2: Very good, Sir, in fact, she's better than ever. And your wife, Sir?
Resident 1: Oh, she's doing just great. You know, Noodle, we should all get together again some time soon.
Resident 2: Sir, it would be my pleasure.
Resident 1: Noodle, the pleasure would be all mine. I'll give you a call.
Resident 2: Very well, Sir. See you later.
Resident 1: See you later, Noodle.
[Residents depart.]

To my regular readers: I apologize for this piece of esoterica. I simply could not resist.